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Parents and Special Education Services, A Series: Part 3

So often when we think of special education, we only think about the individuals with the disability. In reality, however, there are many more people involved in the education and advocacy for these individuals. Part of that team includes the parents and caregivers of those with disabilities. For the past couple of weeks, I have been interviewing parents and sharing their experiences with the SPED system. You can find previous posts here and here.

Today’s post is from an interview with Marina, a former second grade teacher and mom to an adorable boy who has been diagnosed with Williams Syndrome. Let’s see what she has to say!

Please tell me a little about your child who is receiving Special Education services. (Age, grade, etc.)

K. just turned 5 and will be attending kindergarten in the fall. He has attended 2 years of SPED preschool in our district and was with early intervention before that. 

What kind of services does your child receive? (general education with pull out services for speech/math/reading, etc., behavior unit, mild-moderate life skills class, etc.)

K. will be in the least restrictive special class for kindergarten. It is called a Core Integrated Class. It is full time with a special ed teacher, smaller class size, and 2-3 paraprofessionals. In addition to academic support he also receives speech therapy, occupational therapy, and physical therapy through the district during school. 

What has been the most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools?

The most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools has been knowing the right questions to ask in order to receive the best services and make the best placement decisions. There is a lot of lingo in the SPED world that makes sense to those who work in it for their job but as a parent it has to be simplified and clarified which I have really had to ask for. The services are of course there but no one is a better advocate for your child than you are so it is crucial to ask all of the questions to stay informed of all of your options. 

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

The most rewarding part about working with various SPED services has been getting to watch the progress. I have been able to see how hard the whole team (teachers, aides, therapists, families) works together. Everyone celebrates the smallest progress and I truly believe that’s how the bigger goals are accomplished. 

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

Our experience so far has been nothing but amazing as far as teacher and student interactions. Teachers in other classes know who K. is and say hi to him often which makes his day. I wouldn’t say they haven’t been inclusive but I do think that is difficult at a preschool age. I am excited for him to experience more inclusivity this fall as that is one goal of the structure of his upcoming placement. 

As a parent, what are some ways you advocate for your child to make sure they are in the least restrictive environment and receiving the services they need and deserve?

As a parent I recognize I am my child’s biggest advocate. I also recognize that there is a lot of emotion also tied to my child. I recently found a parent consultant and she helped be another set of eyes and ears. She was truly amazing. She and I met before the IEP meeting and discussed current goals, future goals, questions, concerns, and options. She attended the IEP meeting with me, took notes, and made sure I was feeling good about all of the decisions being made as well as got all of my questions answered. I involved myself as much as I could. Volunteered, helped with class parties, attended parent teacher conferences, asked for progress notes, worked on goals at home, etc. it is so much easier to advocate when you’re very involved. 

If you could tell one (or two or more) thing(s) to people who don’t have much experience with working with children with disabilities of any kind and severity, what would you tell them?

Find someone you can trust that does have experience and ask questions. For teachers, aides, educators: have compassion and patience not only for the child but the parents and families. It can be really overwhelming trying to navigate the SPED world on top of everything else that comes with having a child with special needs. Be an advocate, challenge the student appropriately and celebrate the small wins daily. To the parents: If you don’t feel good about something, speak up. Ask to see the data and have the data explained to you in a way you understand. I would highly recommend seeing if there is a parent consultant/advocate in your area. They are on your team and a good person to lean on. 

Thanks, Marina! I really appreciated her perspective, and loved that she was able to find a parent consultant to help her as she navigates the SPED world and making sure her son is getting the best care possible.

Next week, we will hear from a parent who has a child on an IEP in high school– I’m excited to hear her words of wisdom!

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Turns Out, Adults Can Learn Cool Things, Too!

I was 29 years old when I started taking piano lessons. I had always wanted to learn how to play the piano, but it was never in the budget when I was little (and we didn’t have a piano). Fast forward 20 years, and I was now a grown adult with a career. The attendance secretary at the school where I was teaching taught lessons from her home, and offered to add me on as a student. I was hesitant— what if I was too “old” to learn? What if I completely messed up and had to keep going to work and face this coworker? I finally got a big dose of courage and took her up on her offer. I had access to a piano for practicing, had the time, and had the money to do it— there really was no reason not to try. 

So there I was, standing at her door with my “Adult Level 1” piano book in hand, heart pounding, mind racing, ready to start a new adventure. It was a little intimidating at first. I did mess up. My “old” brain did take a little longer to pick up the concepts. But you know what? Slowly but surely, I started to get the hang of it. I practiced every day after work. If I messed up, I tried again. I did my best to make the most of this new opportunity. I was proud of the progress I made, and even found myself making my fiancé listen to me on our nightly phone calls. I felt like a little girl, so excited to share my new talents. 

I took lessons for several months before I got married and moved to another state. I didn’t have access to lessons or a piano while we were living away, and then soon after we moved back, we started having kids, so my skills faded, and eventually became a memory. Fast forward eleven years, and I was casually scrolling FaceBook, when I saw a post from a neighbor— they had been given a new piano and were giving away their old one for free! My heart lit up. I immediately commented that we would take it. We rearranged our living room, recruited some neighbors to help us move it, and are now the proud owners of a beautiful piano. My husband can play pretty well, and it has been so nice having piano music fill our house. 

I didn’t touch it for a few weeks. I loved hearing the music, but knew my skills were rusty and would need some serious work. One day when all my kids were out playing with friends and my husband was at work, I pulled out my old piano book and started to remind myself how to play. The music was slow and choppy, but I was playing! I was reading the notes and making music! It was amazing! My fingers and my brain moved in unison as muscle memory took over and it started to come back to me. 

Now, I don’t want you thinking that I was suddenly playing all sorts of complicated music, because I wasn’t. But I was amazed at how my brain pulled out what it knew and started to use it again. It was proof to me that once you learn something, your mind retains it. Sure, it may be tucked way back in the deep corners of your brain, but it’s there, and as you start to tug on the memory or skill, it slowly works it way toward the front. 

If you’re like me and have a skill you learned long ago but have since stopped using, try it again! Tug on that memory and start to spark muscle memory. Dust off the piano, violin, wood working tools, skateboard, paint brushes, or whatever else it may be and give it a go. I bet you’ll be surprised with the way things start to come back to you. And if you have a skill you’ve always wanted to learn, but haven’t had the chance to for whatever reason, do it! If you have the resources, take the leap and try something new! You don’t have to be an expert at it, but trying is so much better than living with the regret of not trying. 

So go ahead, prove to the world that you can teach an old dog new tricks! 

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Celebrating Differences

Have you ever been faced with a situation where your child loudly points out someone’s differences? The way we respond in situations like that can determine and change how our children perceive differences. If we respond with disgust, that is how our children will see differences. If, however, we respond with love, compassion, and kindness, our children will pick up on that and will learn to show empathy and love to those differently abled than them. 

It is so important— even crucial— to teach our children and students to view differences as a beautiful thing rather than something that sets them apart. Teaching inclusion is vital to raising a generation of kids who love and encourage people of all abilities. 

Sometimes it can be difficult to explain differences to kids in a way that makes sense to them. Thankfully, there are some incredible children’s books out there that do a beautiful job of teaching this. Here are a few that I found at my local library that were well written and that I feel do a good job of teaching the importance of inclusion.

Benji, the Bad Day, and Me by Sally J. Pla, Illustrated by Ken Min

Sammy is having the worst day ever. He comes home from school, feeling defeated and upset. But instead of being met with sympathy and kindness, his mother shushes him and tells him he needs to be quiet because his brother, Benji, had bad day and needed quiet. Sammy’s day continues to get worse, and he feels like no one notices him. Benji saves the day when he helps Sammy feel safe and comforted by wrapping him in a blanket, which is Benji’s favorite way to calm down and feel safe. 

Benji has autism, and is easily overwhelmed with loud noises or other sensory input. When Sammy doesn’t think anyone notices him, he is surprised to see that his brother does see him and is able to help him the best way he knows how.

This story is a tender example of how connected brothers can be, and the differences don’t have to separate them.

You Are Enough: A Book About Inclusion by Margaret O’Hair, Illustrated by Sofia Cardoso

Full of darling illustrations, this book celebrates the differences in each child. It shows that all people are enough, regardless of looks, abilities, race, etc. The story is inspired by Sofia Sanchez, a girl with Down syndrome who has embraced her differences and can be seen on TV, in ads, and on other media outlets. 

This books encourages all children to look in the mirror and celebrate what they see, and that they are enough, just as they are! 

When Charley Met Emma by Amy Webb, Illustrated by Merrilee Liddiard

Charley’s mom has always taught him that “Different isn’t weird, sad, bad, or strange. Different is different. And different is ok!” Charley and his mom go to the park and while there, they see a girl in a wheelchair with limb differences. For a moment, Charley forgets that different is okay, and loudly asks why the girl looks so weird. Rather than shaming, his mom uses the moment to remind and teach, encouraging Charley to go talk to the girl. 

He does, and discovers that her name is Emma, and that she likes to do all the same things Charley likes to do. Together, they play and have fun, and easily become friends. 

This book is a great reminder that ability isn’t always determined by what our bodies look like. Kids of all abilities and looks are able to have fun and be kids— because different is ok!

Different: A Great Thing to Be! By Heather Avis, Illustrated by Sarah Mensinga

Macy is a girl who is different than other kids around her. Sometimes she feels hurt by the comments and looks other kids give her. Rather than letting it hold her back, she embraces her differences and celebrates who she is. She finds ways to show other kids that while she is different, she is still a kid who can love, laugh, play, and be a friend.

Oona and the Shark by Kelly DiPucchio, Illustrated by Raissa Figueroa

Oona is a mermaid who likes all the things mermaids usually do. She loves to collect things, build inventions, and isn’t afraid of noise. One day she meets a shark who doesn’t seem to like all the things Oona likes. She is determined to make him like her things, inventions, and noise. With every attempt, she finds that the shark pulls further away. In one last attempt to win him over, she decides to throw a party. When shark doesn’t come, she retreats to the ocean floor to sit in quiet for a minute. There, she sees sea glass and has an idea. Using her brilliant mind, she creates a quiet sea glass sorting machine. When she presents it to shark, she is pleased to find that he likes it very much. She realizes that not everyone is the same, and that differences are okay.

The illustrations in this book are so beautiful, and the story is captivating!

We’re All Wonders by R.J. Palacio

Inspired by the novel Wonder, this children’s book follows Auggie, a child who was born with severe facial differences. Auggie takes readers on a journey of how people react to him, how he feels, and how he copes with the pointing fingers and mean words. The book ends with reminding readers that everyone is a wonder in their own way, and to “look with kindness and you will always find wonder.” 

Including all people, regardless of ability, appearance, or diagnosis is a vital thing for kids to learn. Many children are naturally inclusive. When adults display kindness, inclusion, and empathy, we encourage those around us to do the same. I encourage you to take a minute and help your children understand the importance of treating everyone with dignity and respect.

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Independence Day Printables

Independence Day is such a fun holiday. Beyond the parades, fireworks, and BBQs, there’s so much history behind the day. Most kids aren’t in school at this point of the summer, so it gives parents an incredible opportunity to teach their children a bit about the history of our nation and the sacrifices and work it took to build our country. No matter your political views, I think we can all acknowledge just how incredible it was what our Founding Fathers did!

Whether you’re staying home this Fourth of July or traveling to be with family and friends, you can use these free printable activities to both keep your kids busy and teach them a little bit about our nation’s birthday!

** These printables are FREE, but please only use them for personal or classroom use. Do not resell, re-post, or claim as your own. **

4th of July I-SpyDownload
Independence Day Word ScrambleDownload
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Parents and Special Education Services: A Series

As a teacher, I became very familiar with the educator side of Special Education. I knew how to read an IEP, how to accommodate the various needs of the students in my classes who had an IEP, and what to watch for to determine if any particular student presented themselves with a need for additional testing and help. I felt pretty confident in my knowledge of the Special Education terms, processes, and procedures. 

It wasn’t until I became a parent of a child who needed Special Education services that I began to see the SPED world in a whole new light. Suddenly, the testing process, IEP meetings, IEP teams, and services became very personal. I was anxious about what this would all mean for my son. 

Almost four years ago, my then two year old was not hitting his speech milestones as expected. We started him with our county’s early intervention program and saw great progress. When he aged out of their program, they set us up with the school district, and let them take over services. He has been on an IEP ever since then, and has made remarkable progress. 

Fast forward a few years, and our youngest three children are all on an IEP and are receiving SPED services for speech. My previous anxieties about having children who qualify for and receive Special Education services have since gone away. I have come to see, now more than ever, that Special Education is an amazing resource, and that I have an incredible role as a parent to advocate for my children and to develop good relationships with their IEP team. 

I know I am not the only parent who has gone through these thoughts and emotions surrounding having a child placed in any kind of SPED services. I interviewed a few parents who have at a child who is currently receiving or have previously received Special Education services for any kind or severity of disability. Join me as I share a series of these interviews over the next couple of weeks! 

My first interview was with Brandy, whose son received speech therapy services for part of his elementary school years.

Please tell me a little about your child who is receiving Special Education services. (Age, grade, etc.)

* L. is 12 and going into 7th grade. He was in speech from 3rd to 6th.

What kind of services does your child receive? (general education with pull out services for speech/math/reading, etc., behavior unit, mild-moderate life skills class, etc.)

* He was in general education with pull out for speech.

What has been the most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools?

* When we first started I knew almost nothing about SPED lingo or the different tools and tests used. Going in for IEPs was difficult when I didn’t feel like I understood what was happening and therefore didn’t know how to be a good advocate for my child.

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

* Having a team of people who care about my child and are working to help him grow has been awesome.

How do you feel other students and teachers respond to and interact with your child? Do you feel like there is a good amount of inclusiveness at your child’s school?

* Inclusivity is huge at my kids’ school. L’s teachers have been super helpful with input during IEP meetings and with helping me know how to best advocate for additional help and testing where needed.

As a parent, what are some ways you advocate for your child to make sure they are in the least restrictive environment and receiving the services they need and deserve?

* Being in speech, my child was already in a minimally restrictive environment. He was only pulled, at most, 10 minutes, twice a week. I feel like my kids’ school does a great job of getting students their service time, while making sure they aren’t missing areas of necessary general education.

If you could tell one (or two or more) thing(s) to people who don’t have much experience with working with children with disabilities of any kind and severity, what would you tell them?

  • Love and caring always comes first. Children can’t effectively learn and grow without it. Once they start picking up on the skills they’ve been working towards, it’s so rewarding to see the pride they take in themselves.

I really enjoyed hearing from Brandy about her experience with the Special Education department in her son’s school. It’s always so great to hear about teachers and support staff who are genuinely concerned with the progress of their students! 

Thank you, Brandy, for sharing your experience!

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Humor in the Classroom

Teachers wear a lot of hats in the short amount of time they are with their students each day. At any given moment, they might be a teacher, a nurse, a disciplinarian, a peace maker, a counselor, or even a comedian or entertainer. This is only one of the ways that teachers are amazing. Elementary teachers especially find themselves switching hats frequently during the day. It’s quite the skill, and is very impressive. 

So often in a classroom, the need for humor or silliness arises. Obviously, teaching isn’t meant to be a comedy act every day, but when used at the right time, comedy can be a great tool. Think of the last time you laughed and how you felt afterwards. I’d bet that most people would say that they felt happier and less tense or stressed after laughing. 

Using humor in the classroom can do a lot for the overall feeling in the room, and can help put people at ease. Humor can be used in many ways and in many situations, such as using it to diffuse a tense situation, make a point, bond with students, or help students remember something you’re teaching. 

Saying or doing something funny can help students feel more at ease. I remember several times using humor to try help lighten the mood in the room right before I handed out tests. While I wanted my students to focus on the test and do their best, I also wanted them to know that the test wasn’t the most important thing in their lives. I also recall times where I was feeling grumpy, tired, or otherwise just not in the mood to be in the classroom. Those times were usually when a student would execute a perfectly timed joke or funny comment, and the result was almost always a happier mood in the room.

Using humor or silliness to illustrate a point or concept can be very effective. When there is an emotion tied to something, there is a greater likelihood that the brain will remember it. When my seventh graders were learning when and where to use each kind of punctuation mark, we watched a short video of Victor Borge, who had created a sound for each punctuation mark. Every time he got to a comma, he would make a specific sound, and would make a different sound every time he got to a period, and so on. (If you want to watch it, click here.) After watching the video, I had students create their own “punctuation sounds” for a reading passage and perform them for the class. The amount of laughter was great that day, and the students talked about it all year long. 

It can feel a bit vulnerable for some people to stand in front of a room and act silly or try to use humor. But, if students see you laughing and making the best of a situation, they are more likely to respond with the same vibe. So many students gather information on the mood in the room, and respond accordingly. 

While humor can be a very effective teaching tool, it’s important to keep in mind that it ought not be used to make light of a very serious situation or to ridicule or speak poorly of any group or individual. There is never a place for jokes, comments, or humor that targets a specific group or person, especially in a negative manner.

Silliness and humor don’t have to be used in every setting or situation, but when the time and place are appropriate, it can make a big difference for all involved. After all, laughter is the best medicine!

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Summer How-To List

Summer time tends to provide kids with ample amounts of free time, which can be a blessing and a curse. Some kids do really well with extra time, and are very creative in how they fill their extra hours. Others, however, struggle with imagining up ways to spend their days, which often leads to lots of, “Mom! I’m bored!” 

Many families create a summer bucket list in hopes of finding ways to reduce boredom over the summer months. It’s a great idea, and provides an easy answer to, “What should we do today?” I’m a big proponent of having the kids help create the list. Obviously, adults should over see the list making to ensure that the desired activities are within the financial, time, and logistical limits the family has. 

In addition to a summer bucket list, I’ve also heard of many families instituting a summer “how-to” list. Each family member comes up with a list of a few things they want to learn how to do over the summer break. Lists could include important life skills such as how to do laundry, cook a meal, tie shoes, mow the lawn, place and pick up a food order, and so on. Other skills might include new hobbies, such as learning to sew a pillow, draw, crochet, or code. Again, adults should guide list making to help kids set realistic goals and to ensure that goals are feasible. 

The idea of a “how-to” list is appealing to many, since it provides kids with something to do, but also gives them an opportunity to learn something and keep their minds active. It’s a win-win! 

To help you get started on your own summer “how-to” list, I’ve created a free download you can print off and use with your kids. Even if you don’t have kids, you can use this for yourself– there isn’t an age limit for learning new things!

** As always, this download is free, and should only be used for individual and classroom use. Please do not resell or claim as your own. **

My Summer How-To ListDownload