Tag: playing outside

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The Best Way for Kids to Prepare Over Summer Break is to…..

Summer break is… almost here? I’m not sure how the weather is where you are, but we seem to be having a very late spring here! Either way, school will be out before we know it. 

That means parents and teachers will be hit soon with ads all over the internet from programs boasting about how great their summer workbook is for kids. Or an online curriculum they can follow through the summer to be “second-grade ready!”

But do you know what these students need over summer break? 

They need to play. Like, REALLY play. Not structured “Let’s add a manipulative to make it seem fun and call it play!” No. They need unstructured, free time to immerse themselves in a world of play. 

They need access to good literature. This means books they might find interesting or want to read, and this also means adults or older kids that read to them. Pack away the reading charts and trackers, just pull out some books and let it come naturally. 

They need to sing. As loud as they can, at the top of their lungs, or just casually as they play. They need to hear and feel and sing music, whatever suits them and your family. 

They need to color and draw and create. No, stop. Don’t get ahead of yourself. Yes, Pinterest has millions of cute crafts your family can do. And sure, you can do them! But what your kids really need to carve out space for is unstructured creative time. Where they can write and draw and have access to craft supplies (within your means/ comfortability level) and let their imaginations go wild. 

They need to be engaged in daily conversation. Discuss why the world is the way it is. Ask questions about their favorite characters from books and movies. Get them chatting about the pro baseball player they look up to or the new video game releasing soon that they’re looking forward to. Tell them about your plans for the day, and tell them your thoughts on the political happenings of the time. Engage in whatever conversation they are willing to have with you.

They need you to not feel guilty about screen time. Everything in moderation! Spending time outside is fantastic! Reading books is great! Diving into an art form is incredible! Screens are amazing! If you spend your summer berating them for spending too much time on screens it can lead to bad effects that you don’t want, like hiding their screens so they don’t get caught, or feeling poorly about themselves for wanting screen time. 

And the last thing they need? More play. More time just being a kid and enjoying their time away from academic pressures. What your kid needs most this summer… is to just, be a kid. 

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When Does Risky Play Become Dangerous Play? How to Find the Balance

I posted earlier this week about the importance of risky play for children, but now I want to expand on one specific aspect of risky play that I feel is one of the biggest struggles caregivers have regarding risky play. 

When does risky play become dangerous play? 

I wish I could give you a straightforward answer, I really do. Because I would love a straightforward answer myself! But there is a lot to this question that we have to analyze ourselves to answer it. 

The first question is- what is the experience level of the child performing the task? Age is irrelevant here. Child A can be an expert at climbing a ladder at 18 months and child B can still be learning the concept at 3 years old. 

Next, you need to analyze the situation. If they fall or fail at what they are doing, what’s below them? Cement or grass? Hardwood floors or carpet? Is there a corner of a table nearby that you need to be aware of? 

My son loves jumping from our couch onto a crash pad on the floor, which is typically an okay activity for him. However, one particular day I noticed a wooden kitchen table chair positioned perfectly next to the crash pad that if he jumped just right, it could harm him. It was a simple conversation, “Hey buddy, do you see this chair next to your crash pad? That might be a problem if you accidentally jump into it! Let’s put it back into the kitchen so we don’t have to worry about it being a problem!” Dangerous play went right back to risky play. 

How much and how close supervision does the child need for the specific activity? And how much supervision can you realistically give them at the moment? 

My 6-year-old loves climbing our ladder to pick apricots off our tree from the tallest branches. However, she is still fairly new at ladders and it’s well above 6 feet off the ground. This task requires closer supervision and most likely some coaching to get her through it, and if I can’t give her that for some reason, then this risky play just turned into dangerous play and should be avoided. With enough time and practice, she will be more confident and able to climb a ladder by herself, making less supervision not dangerous anymore. 

Safe, risky, and dangerous play is always ebbing and flowing. It can change day to day and even hour to hour as children work hard at their play, fail and falter a few times, analyze how they can do better, and try again. And as time goes on, you also become more experienced and better at determining what is risky and what is dangerous for your child.

Really, risky play is just one big science experiment for them to do over and over, analyze, and then learn from. I think if you can allow yourself to step back and foster their risky play, you might be amazed at how much they really can accomplish on their own. 

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Are Extra Curriculars Helping or Harming?

School is out and you rush there to pick up your kids directly from school because if the bus brings them home today, you won’t have enough time to get a good snack in them and shuttle them off to practice. 

Once football drop off is done, you drive across town to gymnastics drop off. By the time you’ve accomplished that, you’re back on the road for skating lessons pick up, it’s your day for carpooling. 

Tomorrow, the story is similar, but swap it all out with viola lessons, ski club, and karate. 

Extracurriculars can be very beneficial for our kids, but at what point is it causing everyone more harm than good? 

Mary wrote about this a few years back, originally sharing one of my all-time favorite videos in her post. Her wise words have stuck with me. She wrote, 

“Here’s my highly scientific equation for why:
Stress of making activity happen > benefit of activity = CANCEL regret-free!
There’s already enough hustle in our lives just to keep things running smoothly.”

Mary Wade

We’ve kept up with this same mindset in our household when it comes to extracurriculars. It can be easy to forget from time to time and sign ourselves up for too much. But right now we are in a sweet spot with activities outside our home where they aren’t a long-term commitment. For the most part, everything is on a month-to-month basis, so choosing to stop if it no longer suits our family’s needs is easily done. Once we enter the stages of paying a lot of money out of pocket for them, the considerations made in order to sign up will be much more serious. I love Mary’s outline for qualifications she looks for in extracurriculars: 

  • kids must be able to walk or bike there (which means I don’t have to play my least favorite role of taxi, we get exercise, and we help our air quality. Win-win-win.)
  • cannot compete with meal times (I’ve found that it’s way too slippery a slope for me to be like, yeah, fast food is fine just for now…)
  • must have a compelling reason to take kids away from free play time (which is at least as valuable as the vast majority of extracurricular activities). 

Being able to walk or bike there can be very situational for each family, but it worked beautifully for hers. 

Competing with meal times is a big one for us, too. We also fall down the slippery slope of yeah, fast food is fine just for now… 

Free play is crucial. It’s essential. It’s the highest form of learning they can have. So extracurricular activities really do need a strong, compelling reason to take our children away from this time.

Yes, extracurriculars will teach your kids discipline and new sports or hobby skills. It can also help them manage their time and it can be a great social connection, too. But the ultimate question you need to be asking yourself when signing your children up for the next thing to keep their week full and busy is, “is this activity helping or hurting the overall well-being of our entire family?” 

In the meantime, check out this video by GoGo squeeZ on the importance of independent, free play. It’s truly eye-opening. 

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The Pure Bliss of Childhood

Their coats are washable. 

The shoes will dry, with time.

Pants can be washed and dried, as well as their bodies. 

Their socks will survive. 

Each and every worry that races in my mind

As they ride and splash and jump

Through every single tiny body of water,

It’s all such a minuscule anxiety

When you’re considering the bigger picture.

The picture that matters more than wet socks

Or muddy bikes

Or tiny cold toes. 

What matters more than all of those combined

Is the absolute bliss

Called childhood. 

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Kids Need Outside Time, Even in the Dark.

I am a firm believer in spending time with kids outside in the winter. But one problem that comes up repeatedly is the daylight hours lessening as winter pushes on. During the summer months, the days are long and the sunlight is plentiful, we’re typically outside by 7 am and the dark doesn’t force us inside until 9 or 10 pm. In the winter where we are, typically the sun starts setting by 5 pm. With school in session as well, this only leaves us roughly an hour of outside time during daylight hours, which is the busiest hour of our day as well, so finding the capacity to get outside can be hard.

But. If we make some changes and get outside even after the sun has gone down, it opens up so much time! It also proves to have its benefits as well. Simply changing up the lighting in which kids play, changes the way they have to think and problem solve. While riding their bike in the daylight hours eventually becomes a mindless activity to them, riding it during the dark forces them to pay extra attention to their surroundings and their bike, and use their intuition and senses to help guide them. Something that was once a mundane, everyday sport turns into an elaborate thinking process for them. 

Our tips for getting outside during the dark hours:

A little bit of risky play while we set up our Christmas lights

Wear the right clothing. The warmer you are, the longer you’ll last. You can read more about clothing here. 

Bring the light with you! Flashlights, lanterns, and glow sticks all work wonderfully. We like to buy our glowsticks on Amazon in bulk, making them more affordable. We’ve invested in LED light beanies also found on Amazon. We keep a handful of Dollar Store flashlights around for use as well as a few bigger, nicer ones that put off more light when needed. Pro tip: attach a glowstick to your child’s coat so you can always spot them. Flashlights are great for them to use, but can be easily dropped. Having something more secure that doesn’t require being held can be immensely helpful. 

Bringing light to the night!

Get creative with the light. Add in Christmas lights, brighter LED porch lights, or bust open spotlights used for working on cars. Our set typically stays up close to the garage door in the winter so it’s easy to access for when we need them. 

Have a set activity when you head outside. I talked about this before in my post about getting outside in the cold, but it’s relevant for the dark, too. Since it’s harder and takes a more active choice to go outside in the dark, choosing your activity before going outside can help. 

Visit well-lit areas. Window shop downtown, take walks around college campuses if they’re available in your area, or visit well-lit parks. 

Do you try to get your kids outside when it’s dark out? What tips would you add? 

Photo by Tobi