Parents and Special Education Services, A Series: Part 4

When considering individuals who receive SPED services, it’s important to note that not all disabilities are visible, and that disabilities come in all shapes and sizes. Another aspect to take into consideration is that people with disabilities can be any age. It doesn’t matter the age, gender, shape, or size of the disability: the fact of the matter is that people with disabilities have the right to be respected and treated fairly. When a student has an Individualized Education Plan (IEP), teachers are legally expected to uphold the terms of that plan, and are required to provide necessary accommodations for their students who have an IEP.

Today’s parent interview is with Bobbie, who has a son with an IEP who is in high school. He is an active, smart young man who has a learning disability. His disability isn’t physically visible, and many people do not even know that learning can be difficult for him. All of his teachers are made aware of his disability and are given a copy of the accommodations he is allowed to receive. Unfortunately, he has had a teacher who did not do their best to uphold the terms of his IEP, which led to frustration for both Bobbie and her son.

Please tell me a little about your child who is receiving Special\Education services. (Age, grade, etc.) 

My child is 15 years old and will be a sophomore this school year. He received his IEP when he was 6 years old in first grade.

What kind of services does your child receive? (general education withpull out services for speech/math/reading, etc., behavior unit, mild-moderate life skills class, etc.) 

My child is currently receiving his services in a co-taught general education math and ELA classroom. When he was in elementary school it was pull out services for reading and math.

What has been the most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools? 

I feel that Elementary school teachers helped with IEPs way better than most secondary school teachers. Many of the secondary teachers, especially those who teach subjects like science and social studies do not follow a student’s IEP accommodations as well as they should. I even had a 9th grade science teacher attend the IEP, and he failed to follow the accommodation of hard copy of notes provided, because he said they could be downloaded from his website, but we were never able to find where to access, and his response was always “they are on my website.” His website was not organized in a way to find anything UNLESS you knew the exact title of his lesson. No dates were provided. This “accommodation” in  his eyes was being met, but was met with a task that was far harder than just making the notes for my child. So I think the most difficult thing is getting secondary teachers to follow ALL of the accommodations needed, and to provide them in a way that makes their learning experience easier and not harder. 

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

I have felt like my voice is heard in the meetings, and that my opinion to help my child matters. I feel like when I reach out to his SPED file holder, I get a response and help with my child. 

How do you feel other students and teachers respond to and interact with your child? Do you feel like there is a good amount of inclusiveness at your child’s school? 

Most people do not know that my child has an IEP. I do feel that some teachers do everything they can to help my child find success, but as mentioned above, there are some who do not make their educational needs easier, but rather make it harder for them to access the content.  My child was able to maintain straight A’s in his classes, but it wasn’t from the help of his science teacher especially. He knew my child was reading 4 grade level below, and did nothing to help him. 

As a parent, what are some ways you advocate for your child to make sure they are in the least restrictive environment and receiving the services they need and deserve? 

As a parent, I make sure that all of the teachers know that my child has an IEP and what accommodations have worked the very best for my child in the past. I let them know that I am available to meet, or talk with them to make sure that my child can learn best in their classrooms. I am also a teacher, so I understand and know how important communication with teachers are to ensure that my child’s needs are being met. 

If you could tell one (or two or more) thing(s) to people who don’t have much experience with working with children with disabilities ofany kind and severity, what would you tell them? 

Children with learning disabilities can do what their peers are doing with enough supports/ accommodations. They can also be students with straight A’s who work extremely hard to learn the content. They are kids who just want others to see them as they would see any other child. They have the ability to love others and to be amazing friends to those around them.

Thank you, Bobbie! I can only imagine how difficult it would be to have a teacher who didn’t do their best to accommodate the needs of students receiving SPED services. I’m impressed with her son’s determination and hard work to succeed despite the lack of help from a teacher. Way to go!

This post is part of a series of posts of interviews with parents who have a child who receives special education services. You can find previous posts here, here, and here.

Parents and Special Education Services, A Series: Part 3

So often when we think of special education, we only think about the individuals with the disability. In reality, however, there are many more people involved in the education and advocacy for these individuals. Part of that team includes the parents and caregivers of those with disabilities. For the past couple of weeks, I have been interviewing parents and sharing their experiences with the SPED system. You can find previous posts here and here.

Today’s post is from an interview with Marina, a former second grade teacher and mom to an adorable boy who has been diagnosed with Williams Syndrome. Let’s see what she has to say!

Please tell me a little about your child who is receiving Special Education services. (Age, grade, etc.)

K. just turned 5 and will be attending kindergarten in the fall. He has attended 2 years of SPED preschool in our district and was with early intervention before that. 

What kind of services does your child receive? (general education with pull out services for speech/math/reading, etc., behavior unit, mild-moderate life skills class, etc.)

K. will be in the least restrictive special class for kindergarten. It is called a Core Integrated Class. It is full time with a special ed teacher, smaller class size, and 2-3 paraprofessionals. In addition to academic support he also receives speech therapy, occupational therapy, and physical therapy through the district during school. 

What has been the most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools?

The most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools has been knowing the right questions to ask in order to receive the best services and make the best placement decisions. There is a lot of lingo in the SPED world that makes sense to those who work in it for their job but as a parent it has to be simplified and clarified which I have really had to ask for. The services are of course there but no one is a better advocate for your child than you are so it is crucial to ask all of the questions to stay informed of all of your options. 

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

The most rewarding part about working with various SPED services has been getting to watch the progress. I have been able to see how hard the whole team (teachers, aides, therapists, families) works together. Everyone celebrates the smallest progress and I truly believe that’s how the bigger goals are accomplished. 

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

Our experience so far has been nothing but amazing as far as teacher and student interactions. Teachers in other classes know who K. is and say hi to him often which makes his day. I wouldn’t say they haven’t been inclusive but I do think that is difficult at a preschool age. I am excited for him to experience more inclusivity this fall as that is one goal of the structure of his upcoming placement. 

As a parent, what are some ways you advocate for your child to make sure they are in the least restrictive environment and receiving the services they need and deserve?

As a parent I recognize I am my child’s biggest advocate. I also recognize that there is a lot of emotion also tied to my child. I recently found a parent consultant and she helped be another set of eyes and ears. She was truly amazing. She and I met before the IEP meeting and discussed current goals, future goals, questions, concerns, and options. She attended the IEP meeting with me, took notes, and made sure I was feeling good about all of the decisions being made as well as got all of my questions answered. I involved myself as much as I could. Volunteered, helped with class parties, attended parent teacher conferences, asked for progress notes, worked on goals at home, etc. it is so much easier to advocate when you’re very involved. 

If you could tell one (or two or more) thing(s) to people who don’t have much experience with working with children with disabilities of any kind and severity, what would you tell them?

Find someone you can trust that does have experience and ask questions. For teachers, aides, educators: have compassion and patience not only for the child but the parents and families. It can be really overwhelming trying to navigate the SPED world on top of everything else that comes with having a child with special needs. Be an advocate, challenge the student appropriately and celebrate the small wins daily. To the parents: If you don’t feel good about something, speak up. Ask to see the data and have the data explained to you in a way you understand. I would highly recommend seeing if there is a parent consultant/advocate in your area. They are on your team and a good person to lean on. 

Thanks, Marina! I really appreciated her perspective, and loved that she was able to find a parent consultant to help her as she navigates the SPED world and making sure her son is getting the best care possible.

Next week, we will hear from a parent who has a child on an IEP in high school– I’m excited to hear her words of wisdom!

Celebrating Differences

Have you ever been faced with a situation where your child loudly points out someone’s differences? The way we respond in situations like that can determine and change how our children perceive differences. If we respond with disgust, that is how our children will see differences. If, however, we respond with love, compassion, and kindness, our children will pick up on that and will learn to show empathy and love to those differently abled than them. 

It is so important— even crucial— to teach our children and students to view differences as a beautiful thing rather than something that sets them apart. Teaching inclusion is vital to raising a generation of kids who love and encourage people of all abilities. 

Sometimes it can be difficult to explain differences to kids in a way that makes sense to them. Thankfully, there are some incredible children’s books out there that do a beautiful job of teaching this. Here are a few that I found at my local library that were well written and that I feel do a good job of teaching the importance of inclusion.

Benji, the Bad Day, and Me by Sally J. Pla, Illustrated by Ken Min

Sammy is having the worst day ever. He comes home from school, feeling defeated and upset. But instead of being met with sympathy and kindness, his mother shushes him and tells him he needs to be quiet because his brother, Benji, had bad day and needed quiet. Sammy’s day continues to get worse, and he feels like no one notices him. Benji saves the day when he helps Sammy feel safe and comforted by wrapping him in a blanket, which is Benji’s favorite way to calm down and feel safe. 

Benji has autism, and is easily overwhelmed with loud noises or other sensory input. When Sammy doesn’t think anyone notices him, he is surprised to see that his brother does see him and is able to help him the best way he knows how.

This story is a tender example of how connected brothers can be, and the differences don’t have to separate them.

You Are Enough: A Book About Inclusion by Margaret O’Hair, Illustrated by Sofia Cardoso

Full of darling illustrations, this book celebrates the differences in each child. It shows that all people are enough, regardless of looks, abilities, race, etc. The story is inspired by Sofia Sanchez, a girl with Down syndrome who has embraced her differences and can be seen on TV, in ads, and on other media outlets. 

This books encourages all children to look in the mirror and celebrate what they see, and that they are enough, just as they are! 

When Charley Met Emma by Amy Webb, Illustrated by Merrilee Liddiard

Charley’s mom has always taught him that “Different isn’t weird, sad, bad, or strange. Different is different. And different is ok!” Charley and his mom go to the park and while there, they see a girl in a wheelchair with limb differences. For a moment, Charley forgets that different is okay, and loudly asks why the girl looks so weird. Rather than shaming, his mom uses the moment to remind and teach, encouraging Charley to go talk to the girl. 

He does, and discovers that her name is Emma, and that she likes to do all the same things Charley likes to do. Together, they play and have fun, and easily become friends. 

This book is a great reminder that ability isn’t always determined by what our bodies look like. Kids of all abilities and looks are able to have fun and be kids— because different is ok!

Different: A Great Thing to Be! By Heather Avis, Illustrated by Sarah Mensinga

Macy is a girl who is different than other kids around her. Sometimes she feels hurt by the comments and looks other kids give her. Rather than letting it hold her back, she embraces her differences and celebrates who she is. She finds ways to show other kids that while she is different, she is still a kid who can love, laugh, play, and be a friend.

Oona and the Shark by Kelly DiPucchio, Illustrated by Raissa Figueroa

Oona is a mermaid who likes all the things mermaids usually do. She loves to collect things, build inventions, and isn’t afraid of noise. One day she meets a shark who doesn’t seem to like all the things Oona likes. She is determined to make him like her things, inventions, and noise. With every attempt, she finds that the shark pulls further away. In one last attempt to win him over, she decides to throw a party. When shark doesn’t come, she retreats to the ocean floor to sit in quiet for a minute. There, she sees sea glass and has an idea. Using her brilliant mind, she creates a quiet sea glass sorting machine. When she presents it to shark, she is pleased to find that he likes it very much. She realizes that not everyone is the same, and that differences are okay.

The illustrations in this book are so beautiful, and the story is captivating!

We’re All Wonders by R.J. Palacio

Inspired by the novel Wonder, this children’s book follows Auggie, a child who was born with severe facial differences. Auggie takes readers on a journey of how people react to him, how he feels, and how he copes with the pointing fingers and mean words. The book ends with reminding readers that everyone is a wonder in their own way, and to “look with kindness and you will always find wonder.” 

Including all people, regardless of ability, appearance, or diagnosis is a vital thing for kids to learn. Many children are naturally inclusive. When adults display kindness, inclusion, and empathy, we encourage those around us to do the same. I encourage you to take a minute and help your children understand the importance of treating everyone with dignity and respect.

Parents and Special Education Services: A Series, Part 2

Last week, I started what will be a series of posts of interviews with parents who have children in Special Education. You can find the first post here. Our next interview is with McKenzie, who has a darling six year old boy who is receiving SPED services. Like me, McKenzie is also a former teacher who was familiar with SPED from a teacher’s perspective, and had to learn how to see it from a parent’s perspective. Let’s see what she had to say!

Please tell me a little about your child who is receiving Special Education services. (Age, grade, etc.)

E. is 6 years old. He just finished kindergarten this year and was on an IEP starting in preschool. He is on the IEP mainly for speech therapy, but also receives OT for a sensory processing disorder. He is also in the process of an autism diagnosis. 

What kind of services does your child receive? (general education with pull out services for speech/math/reading, etc., behavior unit, mild-moderate life skills class, etc.)

E. does OT in school as well as Speech Therapy. He is in the GenEd class the rest of the time. 

What has been the most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools?

I wasn’t prepared for the emotional toll as a mom. I have a BS in Elementary Education and know the ins and outs of SPED and IEPs and this whole SPED world, but I knew it from a teacher’s perspective. I wasn’t as prepared to enter it as a parent, and it was emotional seeing it from that perspective. 

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

Watching E. improve and thrive in school has been incredible. We were extremely worried about sending him to public school and considered home schooling him, but watching him meet his goals on his IEP over time felt very rewarding. Working with the SPED team has also been incredibly rewarding because of the community and support they provide (more on that in the next q). 

How do you feel other students and teachers respond to and interact with your child? Do you feel like there is a good amount of inclusiveness at your child’s school?

The outpouring of love and support from everyone on his IEP team has been incredible! His speech teacher, his OT, the principal, the GenEd teacher, even the PE teacher and the secretaries… literally EVERYONE he interacts with has his best interests in mind and they all have wanted to rally together to give E. the best school experience possible. 

As far as other students, they are too young to even register that there are small things that set E. apart from everyone else. I do worry about how the students will start treating him in later grades when they see him wearing his noise cancelling headphones often, playing with fidgets constantly, and being able to walk out of the classroom for a break whenever he wants (per his IEP).

As a parent, what are some ways you advocate for your child to make sure they are in the least restrictive environment and receiving the services they need and deserve?

Right now, I’m not having to do much in the school to advocate for E. In fact, I think the teachers are advocating for him TO ME instead! I was nonchalant about getting him tested for autism because I’ve had so much push back from medical professionals to the point of one doctor saying flat out “He doesn’t have autism and you’re wasting your time trying to get him a diagnosis.” So I stopped pursuing it. But at an IEP meeting, they convinced me that I needed to push for it more and listed all of the ways an autism diagnosis could help him day to day and in the long run. Now we are back to working on an autism diagnosis with a new team of doctors, so that’s where I’ve spent all of my time advocating! 

If you could tell one (or two or more) thing(s) to people who don’t have much experience with working with children with disabilities of any kind and severity, what would you tell them?

That these kids are not bad, even though they sometimes may come across as that. Their brains are just working differently than yours, and that’s not something to be punished or looked down on, it’s something that needs tolerance, understanding, and love. And you’ll get much further with these kids acting out of tolerance, understanding, and love than you will any other way. 

Thank you, McKenzie! Thank you for reminding us that kids in SPED need our love and understanding!

Parents and Special Education Services: A Series

As a teacher, I became very familiar with the educator side of Special Education. I knew how to read an IEP, how to accommodate the various needs of the students in my classes who had an IEP, and what to watch for to determine if any particular student presented themselves with a need for additional testing and help. I felt pretty confident in my knowledge of the Special Education terms, processes, and procedures. 

It wasn’t until I became a parent of a child who needed Special Education services that I began to see the SPED world in a whole new light. Suddenly, the testing process, IEP meetings, IEP teams, and services became very personal. I was anxious about what this would all mean for my son. 

Almost four years ago, my then two year old was not hitting his speech milestones as expected. We started him with our county’s early intervention program and saw great progress. When he aged out of their program, they set us up with the school district, and let them take over services. He has been on an IEP ever since then, and has made remarkable progress. 

Fast forward a few years, and our youngest three children are all on an IEP and are receiving SPED services for speech. My previous anxieties about having children who qualify for and receive Special Education services have since gone away. I have come to see, now more than ever, that Special Education is an amazing resource, and that I have an incredible role as a parent to advocate for my children and to develop good relationships with their IEP team. 

I know I am not the only parent who has gone through these thoughts and emotions surrounding having a child placed in any kind of SPED services. I interviewed a few parents who have at a child who is currently receiving or have previously received Special Education services for any kind or severity of disability. Join me as I share a series of these interviews over the next couple of weeks! 

My first interview was with Brandy, whose son received speech therapy services for part of his elementary school years.

Please tell me a little about your child who is receiving Special Education services. (Age, grade, etc.)

* L. is 12 and going into 7th grade. He was in speech from 3rd to 6th.

What kind of services does your child receive? (general education with pull out services for speech/math/reading, etc., behavior unit, mild-moderate life skills class, etc.)

* He was in general education with pull out for speech.

What has been the most difficult thing about navigating the SPED world in schools?

* When we first started I knew almost nothing about SPED lingo or the different tools and tests used. Going in for IEPs was difficult when I didn’t feel like I understood what was happening and therefore didn’t know how to be a good advocate for my child.

As a parent, what has been the most rewarding or positive thing about working with SPED services in schools?

* Having a team of people who care about my child and are working to help him grow has been awesome.

How do you feel other students and teachers respond to and interact with your child? Do you feel like there is a good amount of inclusiveness at your child’s school?

* Inclusivity is huge at my kids’ school. L’s teachers have been super helpful with input during IEP meetings and with helping me know how to best advocate for additional help and testing where needed.

As a parent, what are some ways you advocate for your child to make sure they are in the least restrictive environment and receiving the services they need and deserve?

* Being in speech, my child was already in a minimally restrictive environment. He was only pulled, at most, 10 minutes, twice a week. I feel like my kids’ school does a great job of getting students their service time, while making sure they aren’t missing areas of necessary general education.

If you could tell one (or two or more) thing(s) to people who don’t have much experience with working with children with disabilities of any kind and severity, what would you tell them?

  • Love and caring always comes first. Children can’t effectively learn and grow without it. Once they start picking up on the skills they’ve been working towards, it’s so rewarding to see the pride they take in themselves.

I really enjoyed hearing from Brandy about her experience with the Special Education department in her son’s school. It’s always so great to hear about teachers and support staff who are genuinely concerned with the progress of their students! 

Thank you, Brandy, for sharing your experience!

The Benefits of Peer Tutoring Programs

Luke was a student of mine many years ago. I still remember his tussled blonde hair, glasses, and sweet disposition. Third period that year was a better place because of him. Luke didn’t get to go to eight different classes like most of his peers; in fact, he only got to attend three or so. Luke was a student in our school’s moderate to severe Life Skills Special Education class. He had a disability that made it harder for him to learn and perform at the same level as his same aged peers. But did this stop Luke from trying his best? Absolutely not! Did this disability stop his peers from including him and helping him? It sure didn’t! I watched countless kids defy the “norm” of teenage behavior and go out of their way to help Luke and other kids like him. It was beautiful to watch. 

One student in particular, Lily, was assigned to be his “buddy” for his time in my class. Our school had a peer tutor program, which allowed mainstream ed students to voluntarily use one of their elective credits for a term to accompany a special needs student to a class and help them during that period. Peer tutors would sit next to these students and help them stay on task, help make sure they had the papers and supplies that they needed, and help them in any other way that was needed. 

The peer tutor program benefited everyone involved. For the special needs student, it gave them a friend to rely on during the class and gave them a sense of belonging. Putting SPED students in the least restrictive environment is essential for development and progress. Peer tutors benefited as well, as it gave them a sense of purpose and pride. They were given the opportunity to work one on one with the most special kids in the school. It also gave them a chance to serve fellow students. The Life Skills teachers were able to breathe easier knowing that their students were in good hands when they got to go to mainstream classes. The mainstream teachers got the chance to witness a special relationship form, and also got the privilege of having such special kids in the classroom. Logistically, having a peer tutor in the room allowed the teacher to be able to continue teaching without having to stop as often since the peer tutor could assist their buddy. The other students in the class also benefited from the program because they got to see the example set by their peers who had given up time to help others. 

I don’t know of a single student who has participated in a peer tutor type program who hasn’t come out a better person. It really is such a unique and beneficial opportunity. I realize it isn’t for everyone, but for those interested, it can be a great chance to help others and make a difference for students who otherwise often get overlooked. 

I know there are programs like this in secondary schools across the nation. If you aren’t familiar with your school’s program, ask a counselor or the Special Education teachers at your school; I’m sure they’d love to educate you on the ways that mainstream students can help their peers.