Tag: support

Posted on

It Takes A Village

“It takes a village” is a common saying amongst parents who are referring to the many people who, in one way or another, help raise or care for their children. I love that the word “village” is used rather than “city”– “village” has such a different feel and connotation than “city”. When I think of a village, I think of a very close-knit community, full of people looking out for one another, caring for each other, and helping each other. Thoughts of a city bring to mind lots of movement, people going about their own business, every man for himself, and lots of chaos and noise. A village is a much more welcoming idea.

While parents are typically the ones known for using this common saying, the idea can absolutely be applied to schools as well. I mean, just imagine what would happen if one single person was running the show at a school! It would be nearly impossible for one person to be principal, secretary, lunchroom worker, custodian, aide, librarian, and teacher. The thought alone makes my head spin. 

Rather than placing the load on one person, the work and responsibility is spread out, with each person having their own area of responsibility. The school truly becomes a village as the staff work together to make sure the students have the best experience possible. They all have the students’ best interests in mind, are willing to jump in and help however they can, and are truly looking out for each other. 

Within a school, there are many hands to make this village run smoothly and effectively. In no particular order, some of those are:

  • Aides/Technicians/Paraprofessionals: These amazing individuals often work behind the scenes, making student and teacher life easier. They pull students for remediation, administer tests, reteach concepts, make copies, grade papers, and more. 
  • Speech Therapists/OT Therapists/SPED technicians/Other Therapists: They are constantly helping students reach their IEP goals, make progress, all while helping students gain confidence and pride in themselves!
  • Custodians: Where would we be without them?! From keeping the school clean, mowing the playground grass, shoveling walks after a snow storm, fixing things that break, and so much more, these guys and gals do so much for schools.
  • Food Service Staff: Making sure no student goes hungry, these people work tirelessly to ensure that there are enough hot meals prepped and ready for hungry bellies come lunch time. 
  • Specialist Teachers– art, music, library, PE, computers, etc.: Not only do these teachers get to do a lot of the “fun” stuff, they also help teachers by taking classes for a bit so that those teachers can plan, grade, and prepare. Specialist teachers also teach important skills that often get neglected within mainstream classrooms.
  • School Counselors: These amazing school staff members make sure that students have access to the tools and resources they need to successfully manage and navigate emotions, hard things, and frustration. They offer a listening ear, sound words of advice, and a safe place for students to land.
  • Secretaries: Another essential part of a school’s structure, secretaries handle all the “business” of the school. They take and make phone calls, track attendance, handle financial matters, and keep things running smoothly overall. They are usually the first people school visitors and parents see when they come to the school, and are there to offer a smiling face to all who come to the building.
  • Administration: Principals and vice-principals often take on the harder assignments– disciplining students, making hard phone calls to parents, managing staff member issues, and so forth. But, on the flip side, they get the chance to interact with all of the amazing students and staff at their school. They work tirelessly for their staff and students, and are constantly on the go.
  • Teachers: Where would we be without teachers? Day in and day out, they are there, ready to instruct, ready to love, and ready to take on the exhausting work that is teaching. They spend countless hours preparing lessons and activities. Their days are spent cheering their students on, managing tricky student behaviors, teaching and reteaching concepts, comforting sad students, redirecting, and so much more. Their jobs are often thankless, but the work they do is crucial. 

The next time you’re at your child’s school, be sure to take a minute and thank the village members helping to teach, nurture, and guide your child. Or, the next time you are at work, go out of your way to thank the other people in your village for the ways they help you with your students. It truly does take a village, and the village only becomes stronger as the people support and appreciate each other.

Posted on

The Spartans of Education

This past weekend, my husband and our two oldest boys ran a Spartan race— a grueling race that includes running along dirt trails for a specific distance all while conquering obstacles along the way. The kids’ races ranged from 1-3K with 10 or so obstacles, and adult athletes could choose between a Sprint (5K + 20 obstacles), Super (10K + 25 obstacles), or the Beast (21K + 30 obstacles). The race course was at a ski resort, which meant steep hills and mountainous terrain. It was 90 degrees outside, and we were at a base elevation of 6,391 feet. It was indeed a test of mental and physical strength and stamina, and was certainly not for the feint of heart. It was truly inspiring to watch the athletes compete and overcome the challenges with which they were faced. 

Some of the obstacles athletes were asked to complete were less intense (like crawling through a tube or crawling under a tunnel), while others were much more intense (such as lifting and carrying a 60 pound ball from one end of the obstacle area to the other and back again, the rope climb, or the inverted wall climb). The obstacles by themselves would be challenging, but not impossible; add in the above mentioned factors of temperature, terrain, elevation, and distance to run, and the obstacles suddenly become much more daunting.

As I’ve reflected on the race over the past couple of days, I couldn’t help but think about how the whole race experience relates to education. At the beginning of each school year, we are given a new set of students, each with their own abilities, talents, likes/dislikes, and interests. They each have their own race to run alongside their classmates, and they all have obstacles to overcome. 

For some students, math may be their rope climb, where they find themselves finally making progress just to start slipping back down as a new concept is introduced. For others, science may be their inverted wall, difficult to gain traction on and overcome, while it may be a tunnel crawl for others, fairly easy to get through. 

It was interesting to watch athletes help each other overcome obstacles. I watched as one friend easily made it over a set of 6 foot hurdles, only to turn around and go back to help her friend by offering a boost to get her started. I watched complete strangers finish the rope climb, then turn to offer strategies and advice to athletes before they took their turn on the rope. I watched as my husband helped another athlete get his footing during a sand bag pull. I was grateful for the four people, all strangers, who stopped and immediately helped my husband when his calves cramped up and he couldn’t walk. As my husband finished the race, two of those people who helped him were waiting for him at the finish line because they “just wanted to see him finish.” It became clear that the people offering help to others weren’t in the race to be the fastest or the strongest. They were there to prove to themselves that they could do it, and to help others do the same. 

As our students learn and grow throughout the year, they are met with many challenges, and some may be in it for themselves, but most are not. Most kids are willing to help their classmates, be a friend, and cheer each other on. It’s remarkable to see the difference it can make when struggling students are boosted by their peers. There is a new light in their eyes when they see that other people believe in them and want them to succeed. 

So while they may be running in the same race, not all students will face the challenges with the same ability or confidence. As teachers, we get the unique opportunity to help facilitate the kind of relationships within our classrooms that will encourage, build, uplift, and carry. We also get the chance to do those things ourselves for our students. We get a front row seat to see our students progress, learn, grow, and thrive. We get to be their cheerleaders, give them boosts, and provide them with tips and advice on how to conquer their challenges. And that, my friends, is one of the coolest parts of being a teacher.

Posted on

A Letter to Sports Parents

Dear Sports Parents,

I promise you that the crazy, chaotic schedules are worth it. The nights you spend in your car, shuttling kids from one practice or game to another, they aren’t a waste of time. The time you spend away from your house, eating dinner on the run, is time well spent. It might not seem like it in the moment, but it is. Your kids may not seem grateful for the sacrifices you are making on their behalf, but one day they will understand. 

That loss that your son’s soccer game had the other night was tough, for sure. But it provided your son with experience, opportunity, and growth. It gave him a chance to practice being a good sport, learning from mistakes, and thinking about how he can improve. 

When your daughter made the drill team, but her best friends didn’t, it was a bittersweet moment for you both. It gave you a chance to talk about being proud of your accomplishments, but not rubbing it in people’s faces. It gave her an opportunity to practice empathy and kindness. 

When your daughter’s basketball team took state, you celebrated. You celebrated the long days/nights of practices, the time spent in the bleachers cheering her and her team on, and the growth you’ve seen in her as she’s played. You celebrated her win because you know it’s important to her, and you know how hard she’s worked for it. You celebrated that she was able to see her hard work pay off.

When your son didn’t make the football team, you cried with him after he found out. You told him how proud you were of him for giving it his best shot. You didn’t tell him that things were going to be okay and that he could always try next year. Instead, you let him feel what he felt, and allowed him to grieve what he didn’t get. You supported him and loved him and encouraged him. When he is ready to try again, he’ll let you know. Until then, you keep loving him and cheering him on in whatever he does. 

When all five of your kids wanted to sign up for sports, and they all overlapped, making your schedule a million times more hectic, you did it anyway. You’ll figure out the transportation and time issue later. For now, you’re giving them all a chance to try something out, take a risk, and learn from their experiences. You’re showing them that you believe in them.

You do all of this because you know the amazing benefits that come from kids being on a sports team. Sure, there are the physical benefits of movement, exercise, and strength. But on a less tangible note, the life skills they learn are innumerable. They learn things on the field, in the studio, or in the pool that can’t be taught as effectively in a classroom. Studies have shown that kids who participate in some kind of sports-related activity actually end up doing better academically. Sports give kids the opportunity to learn how to work as a team and how to be a good teammate. Kids learn about sportsmanship. They learn to support and cheer on their peers. They learn that winning isn’t everything. They become more confident. They learn what they are capable of, and how to push themselves beyond what they thought was possible. Sports allow kids to take risks and try new things. Friendships are formed, lessons learned, and new skills are gained. 

So yes, being a parent of a kid (or kids) in sports can be exhausting. It’s time consuming. It can be financially straining at times. But it’s so worth it. The effort you put forth in supporting them is never wasted, and will have lasting effects. So the next time you find yourself scarfing down a protein bar as you drive your son to practice, then race across town to pick your daughter up from her game, remember what you’re doing is important, and is totally worth the sacrifice.

Sincerely,

A fellow sports parent and former teacher

Posted on

Parent Involvement and its Benefits

There are many different types of parents/guardians. They can range from the completely uninterested and uninvolved to the epitome of a helicopter parent, and everywhere in between. I don’t think there’s one “right” or “wrong” way to parent; everyone has their own style, and it often varies from kid to kid. There are obviously parents who are on the extreme ends of the spectrum, but I think that as long as you’re providing your children with the essentials— food, clothing, shelter, healthcare, and love— and not harming them, you’re doing a-okay. 

But I’m not here to tell you how to parent, or even to offer parenting tips and strategies. I’ll leave that to the parenting experts. I will, however, explore how parental involvement, or lack thereof, can impact a child. There are a lot of things that contribute to a child’s success and confidence, and parental involvement is pretty high up on that list. Before we dive into the why behind it, I want to add a disclaimer that I know not all kids have a parent present in their lives. I understand that all families are different. For the purposes of this article, I will use the term “parent” to describe any adult who is a guardian or caregiver to a child, in any capacity. 

Having the support of a parent figure can, and does, positively impact how a child performs in many areas of their life. Knowing that there is an adult who loves and supports them gives a child an increased sense of safety, belonging, confidence, and assurance. It’s similar to a tightrope walker knowing there is a safety net under them; they know if they fall, there will be something there to catch them and keep them safe. Kids who have positive adult supports know that there is someone there to catch them and help them. Being a child’s safety net is an important role. 

In my experience as a teacher, I noticed a large discrepancy between my students who had little to no parental support and those that did have parental support. I’m sure you can guess, but my students who didn’t have much support at home struggled academically. They often had lower grades, would struggle to keep up and learn the material, and often would be disorganized, unkempt, and would also frequently have behavior problems. On the other hand, students who did have parental support typically had higher grades, a more positive attitude, and less behavior problems. 

As I’ve thought about the why behind these discrepancies, I’ve realized that there’s not just one reason why parent involvement can impact a child so deeply. But what I do know is that if a child has someone at home who doesn’t show interest in what’s going on at school and isn’t aware of what’s happening in and out of school, that child is more likely to stop caring as well. If there isn’t anyone at home to answer to, many children see that as an opportunity to give minimal effort. I believe that often times, these decisions to not try or to act out in school or other areas are cries for help— a cry that they hope will gain any amount of attention from their parental figure(s). 

The reasons parents might not be involved can vary just as much as the types of parents out there. Some parents might not be involved by choice. Perhaps their parents didn’t care much about their academic success, and they choose to continue the cycle with their own kids. Involvement requires effort, and for some parents, it’s an effort that is beyond what they can or want to put forth. Other parents might find themselves in the midst of things out of their control— things like health problems or work responsibilities— and may wish that they were able to be more involved and present. Parents who have been pulled away from their children due to custody issues, incarceration, or other legal issues can find it difficult to be involved with their kids. Whatever the reason, these examples of lack of involvement can all have a negative impact on a child’s success to one degree or another. 

On the other hand, there are parents who are actively involved in their child’s life. They are at parent-teacher conferences, performances, games, concerts, appointments, and programs. They ask questions and are aware of the who, what, where, when, and whys of their child’s life. They help with homework and take interest in what they child is learning at school. They know about the report they are writing for English or the experiment they did in Biology that day. They chat with their kids while they make dinner, fold laundry, or drive to practice. The kids of these parents know that their parent(s) have their backs, and that they are willing to put forth the effort to help them succeed; those efforts are reflected in grades, confidence, and attitude. 

Now, I understand that not all parents are able to be involved in every second of their child’s life. I know that not all parents can make it to every game or performance. This doesn’t make them a bad parent. It doesn’t make them uninvolved. You can be an involved parent without being physically present at every event. Involvement looks different for every person. For some, it does mean attending everything. For others, it means asking questions and being aware. It can look like helping with homework in the evening. It can even look like a FaceTime call during an award assembly. You don’t have to be a helicopter parent to be involved. BUT— you do have to put forth some effort to be an active part of your child’s life. 

However you choose or are able to be involved in the life of your child, make it count. Make sure your child knows you support them, love them, care for them, and are there for them. Foster positive relationships, and you will create a bond that is strong between you and your child. No parent is perfect, and no parent can be to all the things all the time. But if there is a little effort involved, your child will feel it, and the positive impact will make itself known for years to come. 

Posted on

Converting Frustration to Teaching Moments #TeacherMom

Last week, I asked my 6 year-old to get something from the car. I knew the item had fallen under the seats, so I added the instruction, “Make sure you look all over!”

She came back empty-handed, telling me it wasn’t there. Of course, with mom omnipotence (momnipotence?), I knew that item was indeed in the car and that she had simply not looked thoroughly enough.

Anyhow, I was ready to heave my usual sigh and go look for it myself when it occurred to me that “look all over” is a very vague and abstract concept for a 6 year-old. My mind jumped to an old-school Sesame Street episode featuring Grover we had recently watched:

I referenced Grover’s silly song about prepositions, telling her, “Try checking one more time, only this time, be sure to be like Grover and look ‘Around…over…under…and through’ all the seats.”

Though she did not end up finding the object during her second search either, she nevertheless took much longer and was clearly far more thorough (in the end I discovered it had fallen down into a remote and camouflaged corner).

As I reflected on that small teaching opportunity, I realized how often I take for granted what I think my kids ought to be able to do, yielding to frustration rather than teaching. In my classroom, I generally made it a point to help my students explicitly identify, “what does _____ look/sound/feel like” (ie, what does working respectfully in pairs look/sound/feel like?).

Yet there were still moments when I felt frustrated by shortcomings I felt my fifth graders should just know by now (penmanship, writing in complete sentences, group work skills). The reality was usually that they simply needed more modeling, more support, more patience.

I hope this #TeacherMom moment will help me better recognize those learning opportunities with my own children and my future students.

featured image: DeathToTheStockPhoto