Category: Life Lessons

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What I Wish I’d Known: College Edition

Remember when you were younger and you used to think about what life would look like after you graduated high school? You’d dream about setting up your college dorm, hanging out with your roommates, and living your best college life. You could hardly wait for the day to come! It seemed like you’d be stuck in high school for ever, but looking back now, it went by in the blink of an eye. And that day you so anxiously anticipated? It’s almost here. In fact, reality might be starting to set in as you get closer to your first day of college. It’s new and exciting, but also maybe a little bit scary. And that’s okay. You’ve never done this before, so of course there are going to be some hesitations and uncertainties.

But you know what? You can do this! You’ve got lots of people cheering you on and wanting you to succeed. Everyone’s college experience will be different and unique to them, but somewhere along the way, everyone needs help figuring out this new stage of life. Here are a few tips I wish I would have known before starting college!

1- It’s okay if you don’t know what you want to major in!

Start with your generals, and maybe take a class or two that focus on a couple of areas of study you are leaning toward. It’s also okay to switch your major part way through your schooling. I went into college thinking I wanted to be an elementary or early childhood educator, then switched to nursing, and then, ultimately, I decided secondary education was the best fit for me. Did it take me a tad longer to get through my degree because of that? Yep. But I don’t regret it one bit; I graduated knowing that I was getting a degree in what I wanted. I had explored other options, realized they weren’t for me, and found what was. 

2- Learn how to manage your time.

You’re an adult now— you’ve got to figure out a time management system that works for you. If you need to get a planner to organize assignments, study times, and social events, then get a planner. If you know you study best in the morning, make sure to set aside time for that. If you get going along and discover that something isn’t working for you, make adjustments as needed. Make sure you are getting enough sleep so that your mind is clear and ready to learn and focus. Balancing school, work, social, and other life responsibilities can be tricky. Be sure to prioritize what you need to and fill in the remainder of your time with the rest. But one thing is sure— don’t forget to schedule time for some self care and fun. You’ll burn yourself out if you hide away and only do school work. Your studies are important, but so are you— take time to take care of yourself!

3- Create a support system.

This is especially important if you have moved away from home to attend college. Find yourself a group of people who can support you and help you. You might have different groups for different needs— perhaps you will find one group of friends from within your major, and you all study together and help each other learn the content. Maybe you will find friends who are your go-tos during down time and fun times. Whatever the case may be, make sure you have people to lean on, and equally as important, make sure that you are that person for someone else! 

4- Have fun!

College is such a fun time of life. You have the chance to meet so many new and interesting people. Invest in relationships that will last a lifetime. Set boundaries for yourself and make sure you are safe in all the ways. Take time to slow down and relax when you can. Don’t be so focused on school that you forget how beautiful life is. Maintain your hobbies the best you can, and cultivate friendships with people you can do those hobbies with. Figure out who you are and where you stand with important political, social, and ethical issues. Get out and explore the area around you. Remember that your experience is what you make it— so make it a good one!

This is an exciting time of life for so many reasons. Take the chance, make the memories, and do your best— life is so much richer if you do!

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Bullying: An Epidemic

One of the jobs of a teacher is to make their classroom a safe place for all students— a place where kids can come and feel like they belong, matter, and are heard. Most teachers I know of do a pretty good job at that, or at least trying their best to do so. Unfortunately, there are some kids who are pretty good at taking a safe place and making it feel not so safe by being a bully. And, equally as unfortunate, these kids are usually sneaky in their ways, often getting away with their behaviors until a situation becomes more serious. 

Bullying isn’t a new problem— it’s an issue that has been present in schools as long as schools have been around, and I don’t see it going anywhere anytime soon. As teachers, we have the responsibility to keep our eyes and ears open and to intervene any time we become aware of a bullying situation. We cannot turn a blind eye to this problem. 

So what can we do? To start, we can teach kindness and acceptance in our homes to our own children as well as to our students in our classrooms. We can encourage students to talk to a trusted adult when they see or hear bullying behaviors or when they are the victim of those behaviors. We can make our selves more aware of what is going on around us. Getting to know our students helps in several ways— it creates a relationship of trust and also can help us notice if something seems “off” or different. We need to be active listeners, doers, and watchers within the walls of our classrooms and our schools. 

If we do become aware of a problem, we can involve administration if needed. Beyond discipline, most admins will be willing to come into your classroom and talk about bullying and the problems it can cause— and the consequences that may result. 

Last school year, my second grader came home one day and told us that a classmate had been mean to him verbally and physically. We talked through the situation and discussed how he can handle it if it happened again. Unfortunately, it did continue happening. My son said he had told the recess aid whenever it would happen, but nothing changed. At this point, I emailed his teacher and explained what had been happening. I was so impressed with how she handled it; it was immediate and firm. She set up new class guidelines and made sure her students knew that she would not tolerate any kind of mean behavior in her classroom. She let them know that if she heard or saw anything happening, there would be immediate consequences and that the principal would become involved. She instituted a kindness challenge where students were given a grid of kind things to do for others. Once they had completed all the tasks on the grid, they could bring their paper back for a prize. Not only did she address the issue of bullying, she went a step further and encouraged all her students to be kinder and more patient with one another. Thankfully the problems my son was experiencing stopped, and the rest of the school year was just fine.

I know not all bullying situations are resolved as quickly and easily as my son’s was. I know for some students, it goes on for weeks, months, or even years, slowly eating away at the victim’s mental health and self esteem. It takes a toll. 

Cyber bullying is becoming more prevalent as technology continues to evolve. Kids (and sadly, even adults) can hide behind a screen and target individuals. Information spreads quickly via the internet, and can be done without the victim ever knowing who the bully is. This kind of bullying is dangerous and scary. It is also cowardly, as the bully doesn’t even have to come face to face with their targets. They can hide in the comfort of their own homes while slowly destroying someone else’s life. 

I don’t know that there are any easy or sure fire solutions to this epidemic happening in our schools. But I do know that we as teachers can make a difference by being alert, attentive, and aware of what is happening around us. We can be proactive by teaching and encouraging kindness. We can be assertive when we notice something happening and get those involved the help they need. While we may not be able to rid the world of bullying, we can certainly start a change within our own classrooms.

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Out With the Old, In With the New!

As we near August, many teachers around the country are holding on to every last second of summer break that is left. They’re soaking in a couple of extra pool days, intentionally not setting their alarms, and are enjoying the freedom of making mid-morning appointments or lunch dates with friends. They’ve got the date of their first contract day in the back of their mind, and are subconsciously aware that it’s coming up quickly. Some may be looking forward to their first day back with excitement, some with nervousness, and others with a mixture of the two. Others, however, may be dreading the day, not quite ready to trade their freedom for cell phone policing and grading. Depending on the year, I’ve experienced both feelings— both the agony and the ecstasy. 

Teachers and other school staff aren’t the only ones in this boat; Students are also feeling the end of summer. They are squeezing in last minute family trips, summer camps, late nights, and late mornings. They are enjoying the endless flow of snacks and popsicles and are living their best lives next to the pool. For most kids, summer is bliss, careless and free. As summer starts to come to an end, they are filled with anxiousness as they wait for class schedules and teacher assignments to be posted. They’re hoping that their best friend is in their class, and that they get the “cool” teacher that everyone wants. It’s a double-edged sword, because they know that along with this excitement of a new year comes the idea of a more structured schedule, homework, and less freedom. Some kids are anxiously awaiting the first day of school because school is their safe place— a place of comfort, happiness, stability, and lack of hunger. For some, summer is the worst few months of the year, and is a time of uncertainty and fear. Other kids may feel anxiousness because school is hard for them and they just don’t want to have that frustration again.

Parents are also stuck in this dichotomous state of anticipation and dread. For many working parents, summer becomes a time of high stress, as they have to find child care, arrange schedules, and manage the guilt that can come from being a working parent. For stay-at-home parents, summer time can mean chaos. Schedules are thrown off, food seems to be flying off the pantry shelves (how are they STILL hungry??), and there is a constant chorus of noise coming from all corners of the house. The house is never clean, and they find themselves saying, “Please shut the door!” approximately 1,352 times a day. Parents are usually exhausted by this point in the summer, and are excited to have more structured days and to have the house stay clean for more than the eight hours the kids are asleep. On the other side of the spectrum, parents are also finding themselves breathing in the last days of summer, watching their kids enjoy childhood. They are feeling nostalgic, and are hoping they’ve created summer memories that will last a lifetime. They are rushing to create last minute moments of happiness as they savor these fleeting moments with their children. 

I find it interesting how something like the start of school can stir so many feelings in people. I guess that’s how it is with change. And while I understand why there is such a wide range of emotions surrounding school, I also hope people know what a privilege it is to be able to attend school and learn. The freedom to be able to sit in a classroom is incredible. Teachers work hard to plan and carry out lessons that are meaningful and engaging, and are doing their best to make school a safe place for their students. 

So, yes, the end of summer can be sad, and the start of school can feel daunting. But it’s also a time to start the new year with a positive attitude and excitement for what’s to come. It’s a time to cherish the memories you made during the summer while also looking forward to making new memories as the school year starts. So as we prepare to send summer out in style, let’s also welcome the school year with open arms, ready to experience whatever is in store for us!

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The Spartans of Education

This past weekend, my husband and our two oldest boys ran a Spartan race— a grueling race that includes running along dirt trails for a specific distance all while conquering obstacles along the way. The kids’ races ranged from 1-3K with 10 or so obstacles, and adult athletes could choose between a Sprint (5K + 20 obstacles), Super (10K + 25 obstacles), or the Beast (21K + 30 obstacles). The race course was at a ski resort, which meant steep hills and mountainous terrain. It was 90 degrees outside, and we were at a base elevation of 6,391 feet. It was indeed a test of mental and physical strength and stamina, and was certainly not for the feint of heart. It was truly inspiring to watch the athletes compete and overcome the challenges with which they were faced. 

Some of the obstacles athletes were asked to complete were less intense (like crawling through a tube or crawling under a tunnel), while others were much more intense (such as lifting and carrying a 60 pound ball from one end of the obstacle area to the other and back again, the rope climb, or the inverted wall climb). The obstacles by themselves would be challenging, but not impossible; add in the above mentioned factors of temperature, terrain, elevation, and distance to run, and the obstacles suddenly become much more daunting.

As I’ve reflected on the race over the past couple of days, I couldn’t help but think about how the whole race experience relates to education. At the beginning of each school year, we are given a new set of students, each with their own abilities, talents, likes/dislikes, and interests. They each have their own race to run alongside their classmates, and they all have obstacles to overcome. 

For some students, math may be their rope climb, where they find themselves finally making progress just to start slipping back down as a new concept is introduced. For others, science may be their inverted wall, difficult to gain traction on and overcome, while it may be a tunnel crawl for others, fairly easy to get through. 

It was interesting to watch athletes help each other overcome obstacles. I watched as one friend easily made it over a set of 6 foot hurdles, only to turn around and go back to help her friend by offering a boost to get her started. I watched complete strangers finish the rope climb, then turn to offer strategies and advice to athletes before they took their turn on the rope. I watched as my husband helped another athlete get his footing during a sand bag pull. I was grateful for the four people, all strangers, who stopped and immediately helped my husband when his calves cramped up and he couldn’t walk. As my husband finished the race, two of those people who helped him were waiting for him at the finish line because they “just wanted to see him finish.” It became clear that the people offering help to others weren’t in the race to be the fastest or the strongest. They were there to prove to themselves that they could do it, and to help others do the same. 

As our students learn and grow throughout the year, they are met with many challenges, and some may be in it for themselves, but most are not. Most kids are willing to help their classmates, be a friend, and cheer each other on. It’s remarkable to see the difference it can make when struggling students are boosted by their peers. There is a new light in their eyes when they see that other people believe in them and want them to succeed. 

So while they may be running in the same race, not all students will face the challenges with the same ability or confidence. As teachers, we get the unique opportunity to help facilitate the kind of relationships within our classrooms that will encourage, build, uplift, and carry. We also get the chance to do those things ourselves for our students. We get a front row seat to see our students progress, learn, grow, and thrive. We get to be their cheerleaders, give them boosts, and provide them with tips and advice on how to conquer their challenges. And that, my friends, is one of the coolest parts of being a teacher.

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Turns Out, Adults Can Learn Cool Things, Too!

I was 29 years old when I started taking piano lessons. I had always wanted to learn how to play the piano, but it was never in the budget when I was little (and we didn’t have a piano). Fast forward 20 years, and I was now a grown adult with a career. The attendance secretary at the school where I was teaching taught lessons from her home, and offered to add me on as a student. I was hesitant— what if I was too “old” to learn? What if I completely messed up and had to keep going to work and face this coworker? I finally got a big dose of courage and took her up on her offer. I had access to a piano for practicing, had the time, and had the money to do it— there really was no reason not to try. 

So there I was, standing at her door with my “Adult Level 1” piano book in hand, heart pounding, mind racing, ready to start a new adventure. It was a little intimidating at first. I did mess up. My “old” brain did take a little longer to pick up the concepts. But you know what? Slowly but surely, I started to get the hang of it. I practiced every day after work. If I messed up, I tried again. I did my best to make the most of this new opportunity. I was proud of the progress I made, and even found myself making my fiancé listen to me on our nightly phone calls. I felt like a little girl, so excited to share my new talents. 

I took lessons for several months before I got married and moved to another state. I didn’t have access to lessons or a piano while we were living away, and then soon after we moved back, we started having kids, so my skills faded, and eventually became a memory. Fast forward eleven years, and I was casually scrolling FaceBook, when I saw a post from a neighbor— they had been given a new piano and were giving away their old one for free! My heart lit up. I immediately commented that we would take it. We rearranged our living room, recruited some neighbors to help us move it, and are now the proud owners of a beautiful piano. My husband can play pretty well, and it has been so nice having piano music fill our house. 

I didn’t touch it for a few weeks. I loved hearing the music, but knew my skills were rusty and would need some serious work. One day when all my kids were out playing with friends and my husband was at work, I pulled out my old piano book and started to remind myself how to play. The music was slow and choppy, but I was playing! I was reading the notes and making music! It was amazing! My fingers and my brain moved in unison as muscle memory took over and it started to come back to me. 

Now, I don’t want you thinking that I was suddenly playing all sorts of complicated music, because I wasn’t. But I was amazed at how my brain pulled out what it knew and started to use it again. It was proof to me that once you learn something, your mind retains it. Sure, it may be tucked way back in the deep corners of your brain, but it’s there, and as you start to tug on the memory or skill, it slowly works it way toward the front. 

If you’re like me and have a skill you learned long ago but have since stopped using, try it again! Tug on that memory and start to spark muscle memory. Dust off the piano, violin, wood working tools, skateboard, paint brushes, or whatever else it may be and give it a go. I bet you’ll be surprised with the way things start to come back to you. And if you have a skill you’ve always wanted to learn, but haven’t had the chance to for whatever reason, do it! If you have the resources, take the leap and try something new! You don’t have to be an expert at it, but trying is so much better than living with the regret of not trying. 

So go ahead, prove to the world that you can teach an old dog new tricks! 

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Creating A Unified Classroom

My third period class on A-days was something special. We started off the year a little disorganized and unsure, but by the end of the first term, we had settled into a rhythm and were in a groove. The kids all got along well, supported each other, cared about their learning, and genuinely cared about each other. It was magical. It was a stark contrast to my fourth period on B-days, who quickly became the class that I had to mentally prep myself for the most— the kids didn’t get along very well, didn’t care if their classmates succeeded, and just plain didn’t care about much. 

As a teacher, I did my best to create a classroom community where all of my students felt safe, included, and supported. I taught the same material, assigned the same assignments, and was consistent in my management. The biggest difference between the two classes? The kids. The students in these two classes came to school each day with different attitudes toward learning. One class came ready to learn, ready to be engaged, and ready to help each other. The other rolled into class, counting down the minutes until the bell rang and they were done. It was every man for himself. 

It’s probably not a surprise that the overall success and grades of the first class was higher than that of the second. It’s amazing what can happen when students care about each other and encourage each other, especially in junior high. When an already vulnerable teen feels safe and supported by their peers, they are more willing to take risks and ask for help when they need it. They are more willing to learn from each other and share their knowledge with others. Confidence increases as students work together to learn. 

The question here, then, is how do we as teachers encourage a tight-knit classroom community? Often times, we can do all that we can, and if the kids just aren’t interested, we can only do so much. But sometimes, students can be encouraged and gently nudged into supporting each other. When we provide opportunities for students to work together and cheer each other on, we are working toward that community feeling. When we give kids the chance to feel like they matter and are safe, the walls start to come down, and they begin to build trust in their peers. This usually isn’t an automatic or natural thing for kids to do, but it is worth working toward. 

We can encourage a classroom community by modeling what that looks like. Share and celebrate successes. Demonstrate what it means to show up and support someone in a time of need. Teach your students to invest in each other by asking questions about their lives and interests. Model what it looks like to genuinely listen. Show how students can have a meaningful conversation where they both hear and are heard. Provide them with opportunities to engage with one another and work together. 

It might take some work and practice, but once they get the hang of it, you will see a difference in your students and the way they show up for class and in the way they treat each other. It’ll be worth it, and you won’t regret it!

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Life-Long Learning

My husband’s job has recently started requiring him to go into the office full time rather than work from home most of the week. We live over an hour from his office, so rather than driving by himself every day, he has opted to join the company vanpool. He now finds himself with anywhere from two to three hours total of commute time, sitting in the back of the van. Instead of wasting his time playing games on his phone, he’s decided to learn some new things. He has researched grilling techniques so that he can get the most use out of his new grill. He’s started learning a new language. He’s read informational articles on self-improvement. He’s proving that learning doesn’t have to stop once you leave formal schooling. 

The value of continued education is immeasurable, as are the things you can learn. The local university where I live offers adult continuing education classes each semester for anyone over 18 years old. The classes are either free or very low cost. They cover subjects like welding, dancing, all kinds of art, physical education, and so on. The goal isn’t to get a degree, but simply to learn a new skill. 

Learning new skills, information, or hobbies does wonders for our adult brains. It keeps them thinking and working. Research shows that continued learning allows brain cells to continue to stretch and grow. Learning improves the brain’s ability to remember things, giving you an edge as you age. Some studies even show that healthy brain activity can delay the onset of memory related conditions such as Alzheimer’s or dementia. 

Other benefits of life long learning include increased creativity, better mental flexibility, more creativity, greater self-confidence, increased career advancement opportunities, more fulfillment in your job and in life in general, increased personal growth, and increased motivation.

When you engage in adult education, you often have the chance to create new friendships and relationships, often leading to other opportunities. You might learn new ways to do things. Perhaps you might pick up a new skill that can benefit yourself or your family. Even if you aren’t pursuing further education for financial gain, learning and researching can prevent boredom, expand your interests, and make you a well-rounded thinker, none of which are bad things!

Just because you aren’t actively working toward a degree or any other kind of certificate, you don’t have to stop learning. Education is for everyone, and it provides both tangible and non-tangible benefits. You don’t have to sign up for a fancy class or spend tons of your free time learning— even a few minutes a day spent reading about a new topic can benefit your brain more than you’ll know. So the next time you find yourself with a few spare minutes, you might consider reading up on how to grow a successful garden or how to bake the perfect cheesecake rather than mindlessly scrolling social media. You’ll be surprised at what you learn, and your family will thank you when you put a slice of homemade cheesecake in front of them!